One of the most frequent challenges I hear from leaders and teams is navigating workplace conflict. When I dig deeper, I often discover that the issue isn't the conflict itself—it's that people don't feel safe disagreeing with each other.
Here's the truth: Conflict isn’t a problem—it’s a signal. The presence of conflict often signals engagement, passion, and diversity of thought. The real challenge is creating an environment where conflict drives innovation rather than division. Teams that master this become more resilient and turn challenges into opportunities for growth.
The Dual Nature of Conflict
Not all conflict is created equal.
Healthy conflict is productive and rooted in respect. It drives better ideas, challenges assumptions, and fosters innovation. Discussions focus on finding the best solution, not winning arguments.
Unhealthy conflict, on the other hand, is destructive. It damages relationships, erodes trust, and creates toxic environments. It can look like people staying silent in meetings but complaining afterwards and decisions getting revisited repeatedly without resolution.
The difference between these scenarios comes down to one thing: trust. When people fear speaking up, innovation stalls, resentment builds, and conflict shifts underground and people dread going to work.
The Foundation: Trust Through Vulnerability
Patrick Lencioni, in "The Five Dysfunctions of a Team," identifies trust as the foundation of high-performing teams. But not just any trust—specifically, the willingness to be vulnerable with each other. This means sharing not just our strengths, but our weaknesses, admitting when we need help, and being open about our mistakes.
How do you know if your team has this kind of trust? Listen for phrases like:
"I made a mistake."
"I need help with this."
"I'm not sure I understand—can you explain that again?"
"I have a different perspective to share."
Building vulnerability-based trust requires intention and consistency. Simple but meaningful practices—like structured team check-ins, shared experiences, and modeling openness—help trust flourish over time.
Understanding Trust: The BRAVING Framework
While trust can seem abstract, Brené Brown’s BRAVING framework provides a practical, actionable tool for building and sustaining it. Each element of BRAVING represents a core aspect of trust in relationships—both personal and professional.
Boundaries
Clear boundaries aren't walls—they're windows into our needs and values. Strong teams make expectations explicit:
Establishing clear work priorities and expectations
Communicating your availability for urgent vs. non-urgent matters
Being explicit about response time expectations
Reliability
Do what you say you’ll do, consistently. Reliability is a practice, not a one-time achievement. It means:
Starting meetings on time (and ending them early)
Delivering what you promise, when you promise it
Speaking up early when you might miss a commitment
Accountability
Own your mistakes, apologize, and make amends. In high-trust teams, accountability becomes a tool for growth rather than punishment:
Leaders: "I dropped the ball on this. Here's how I'm fixing it."
Teams: "I see a potential issue. Can we discuss it?"
Everyone: "What can we learn from this?"
Vault
Respect confidentiality and avoid gossip. Confidentiality builds trust both ways:
Don’t share information that isn't yours to share
Create clear guidelines about what information can be shared and with whom
Acknowledge and respect different cultural norms around privacy
Integrity
Choose courage over comfort and practice your values consistently. Values must be lived, not just posted on office walls:
Make difficult decisions transparent
Align actions with stated values, especially during challenging times
Address concerns promptly and openly
Non-judgment
Create space where team members can ask for help without fear of judgment. Creating psychological safety means:
Encouraging questions and concerns.
Respecting different working styles and preferences
Supporting team members who ask for help
Generosity
Assume positive intent in others’ actions and words:
Check assumptions before reacting
Provide context for requests and decisions
Offer support before it's asked for
Discussing BRAVING as a team can uncover both strengths and gaps in trust. By making trust more tangible, teams can work on it in specific, actionable ways.
Leveraging Trust for Healthy Conflict
With trust as the foundation, teams can engage in productive conflict—where ideas are debated vigorously, but relationships remain intact. Lencioni explains that trust enables people to challenge each other’s thinking in pursuit of the best solution, not personal victory.
Signs of Healthy Conflict:
Focuses on ideas and solutions
Involves active listening and curiosity
Results in better understanding
Ends with clear next steps
Signs of Unhealthy Conflict:
Attacks people rather than problems
Features defensive reactions
Creates lasting tension
Leaves issues unresolved
By fostering trust, organizations create a culture where people feel safe engaging in honest, respectful conflict—leading to better decisions and stronger teams.
Moving Forward: Your Next Steps:
If you want to build a stronger, more engaged, and more inclusive team, start by strengthening trust and creating space for productive conflict.
Assess your team’s trust level using the BRAVING framework.
Identify one BRAVING element to focus on improving.
Schedule regular check-ins to discuss team dynamics.
And remember:
Model Vulnerability – Leaders set the tone by demonstrating trust and openness.
Set Clear Norms – Define and regularly revisit expectations around communication and conflict.
Encourage Diverse Perspectives – Create opportunities for all voices to be heard, not just the most vocal ones.
Trust-building isn’t a one-time event—it’s an ongoing practice. The goal isn’t to eliminate conflict but to make it productive, allowing diverse perspectives to drive innovation and growth.
Recommended Resources
• The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni
•Dare to Lead by Brené Brown